


The Idiot's Love Song

by jusrecht



Category: DBSK | Tohoshinki | TVfXQ | TVXQ, JYJ (Band), Super Junior
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-09-26
Updated: 2013-09-26
Packaged: 2018-01-09 18:59:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,630
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1149629
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jusrecht/pseuds/jusrecht
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's just another day in Shim Changmin's college life. Or so he thinks.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Idiot's Love Song

**Author's Note:**

> A birthday present for my sister :)

The long and short of it is, Heechul has a photo of him with his pants down.  
  
 _Both_ of his pants.  
  
“This is not blackmail,” the egotistical, narcissistic Fashion major announces, smiling malevolently, “but unless you participate in my show, this picture is going to end up on the front page of our campus’ website.”  
  
“Which part of it is not blackmail,” Changmin starts snarling, but Heechul cuts him off with a careless wave of hand.  
  
“Banalities,” he says with a disdainful sniff. “Really, you’ve got to stop being fussy over the smallest things. It’s so unattractive.”  
  
Changmin shuts his mouth, mostly because he is one millisecond away from hurling profanities at his senior and, well, the exact same senior still has that stupid, blasted, cursed-to-hell-and-back-a-million-times picture of shame. Life is full of tribulations indeed.  
  
The even worse torment, however, is not the malicious triumph shining in Heechul’s eyes. The even worse torment is sitting next to him with tears of laughter running down his face.  
  
“Shut up,” Changmin snaps at that particular direction. The sight of his best friend and roommate laughing at what is obviously the worst moment in his life is enough to make him want to vow off alcohol for the rest of said life.  
  
“Just look at it from the brighter side.” Kyuhyun finally calms down enough to string coherent words together, even if he is still wiping drops of gleeful tears from his eyes. “What you actually have to do—if you really think about it—is only to wear some clothes this guy makes and strut on a stage. The clothes will be embarrassing, no doubt, but really, what’s so hard about it?”  
  
“I’m glad you think so, Cho,” Heechul purrs, a diabolical smirk creeping to his lips, “because his photo happens to be not the only one I plan to exploit.”  
  
Colours drain from Kyuhyun’s face. This time, it’s Changmin who doesn’t stop laughing for five minutes straight.  
  
  
–  
  
  
“My concept is an all-male show,” Heechul announces to his eight unfortunate victims later that day. They are gathering around a table in a secluded corner of the campus cafeteria—which is still far too exposed, in Changmin's opinion, especially for discussing something of this nature. His only consolation is that at least he knows all the people in the group except one, a silent, shy-looking guy sitting next to the prince from the Performing Arts major, Jung Yunho.  
  
“I don't understand,” Kim Ryeowook says from his left. “I thought you’re supposed to compete against Zhou Mi to see who can make the best-looking gala clothes from the cheapest materials.”  
  
“Exactly.” Heechul nods graciously. “Which means that four of you will wear the dresses and the other four will wear the suits and tuxes.”  
  
“I’m outta here.” Kangin rises to his feet and is about to beat a hasty escape if not for Heechul’s ‘accidentally’ dropping the brown envelope he has been waving around. A few pictures spill out and Kangin quickly returns to his seat, muttering profanities under his breath.  
  
“Now that we understand each other,” Heechul continues, smiling complacently, “let’s get down to business. Like I said, you’ll be divided into two groups. For the ‘ladies’, don’t worry. You’ll look absolutely gorgeous in my hand.”  
  
Lee Sungmin, the social butterfly from Poli-Sci, is the only one who looks even remotely pleased by the assurance. “Cool. My girlfriend always complains whenever I play dress up, but now I’ll get to do it on a runway,” he says with what can only be described as a very excited smile. Changmin eyes him weirdly.  
  
“Dude, you like wearing a dress or something?”  
  
Sungmin shrugs. “I look pretty in it.”  
  
“Fantastic,” Heechul cuts in before Changmin can even begin to _think_ of a reply. “You will be one of the ‘ladies’. And so will you, Wookie—you have a small build, so just sit where you are ad accept it. Yunho and Kangin, you two have to be the gentlemen because I need proper ammunition on that front too. Which leaves us with the four of you.”  
  
Changmin waits with bated breath as Heechul frowns and considers them one by one. “Fine,” he says at last, sighing deeply, “let’s draw lots.”  
  
“What?” Changmin gapes.  
  
“What?” Kyuhyun barks. The other two, Yesung and silent guy, remain silent.  
  
“Draw lots,” Heechul repeats and starts tearing a paper napkin into four long strips. He dips two into ketchup and the other two into soy sauce, and then hides the marked ends in his clenched fist. “Ketchup for ladies and soy sauce for men,” he declares. “Pick one and decide your fate, people.”  
  
After a brief squabble, Changmin fixes his choice on the one farthest from him. “I’m going to own your ass,” he smirks at his best friend.  
  
“Dream on, Shim,” Kyuhyun retorts, eyes narrowed.  
  
“In count of three,” Heechul tells the four of them. “One. Two. _Three._ "  
  
Changmin yanks his chosen strip from Heechul’s grip and almost squeals. He gets soy sauce.  
  
Kyuhyun, on the other hand, is nowhere nearly as lucky and his face is currently wearing the most hideous expression which has ever graced this earth. Changmin starts laughing maniacally.  
  
And then there is a thud.  
  
Silent guy, as it turns out, has fainted.  
  
  
–  
  
  
Silent guy’s name, Changmin learns three minutes later, is Junsu.  
  
“I’m sorry,” Junsu says as soon as he’s back to the world of the living, eyeing his ketchup-smeared hand morosely. “I haven’t slept for three days. And now the shock… yeah.”  
  
Changmin silently sends prayer to every deity above for sparing him from the terrible fate of cross-dressing in public. Yesung, he’s pretty sure, is doing more or less the same.  
  
“This is ridiculous.” Suddenly Kyuhyun whirls around and stares accusingly at Heechul. “Why can’t you just use _actual_ girls for the show and tell them to wear the dresses? We’re guys, damn it.”  
  
“Because I want my show to be unique,” is Heechul’s prompt, no-nonsense reply. “This isn’t only about fashion; this is also entertainment, which means that the audience has to be entertained and there’s no way that I’m going to lose from that thin stick on legs when it comes to that.”  
  
“Except you will,” Kyuhyun mutters loudly. Heechul shoots him a dirty glare.  
  
“Wait until I’m done with you, Cho,” he declares ominously. “Actually, wait until the twenty-sixth, when the whole school—including your boyfriend—sees you in a drag.”  
  
There is a moment of horrified pause, and then Kyuhyun bravely lies, “He won’t be here on the twenty-sixth. There’s some business thing with his father.”  
  
Heechul’s eyes glint as a positively ruthless smirk curves his lips. “Oh, really? Guess who’s catwalk-ing for Zhou Mi on the twenty-sixth.”  
  
  
–  
  
  
“Go to Switzerland.”  
  
Already exhausted from too much cringing and laughing today, Changmin settles for snickering quietly to himself as he watches the drama unfolds before his eyes. It never stops being funny how Choi Siwon, one of the most popular students in their college and Yunho’s only competition for the so-called prince title, always goes absolutely potty around his nerd best friend.  
  
“I missed you, Kyuuuu,” Siwon says happily, face breaking into a huge smile, and then proceeds to wrap himself around Kyuhyun like a giant octopus.  
  
“Go to Switzerland until the twenty-sixth,” Kyuhyun repeats adamantly, voice muffled and all—he clearly refuses to be distracted. “Or the North Pole. Or _Mars_. Just go away.”  
  
“Why would I–”  
  
“I don’t want to see your face until the twenty-sixth.”  
  
“But baby boo–”  
  
“YOUR NICKNAMES ARE STUPID AND YOU ARE STUPID AND I DON’T WANT TO SEE YOUR STUPID FACE UNTIL THE TWENTY-SIXTH.”  
  
“Because he’s going to wear a dress on the twenty-sixth,” Changmin adds helpfully.  
  
If it weren’t for Siwon’s magnificent arms, which are wrapped tightly around Kyuhyun’s torso, Changmin knows that he would already cease to exist. There is a reason why despite being a certified nerd, most students refrain from making fun of Cho Kyuhyun.  
  
“I’m going to _end_ you.”  
  
“You’re going to wear a dress?” Siwon suddenly asks, seemingly oblivious to his boyfriend’s mood. In fact, there is a dazed, almost hopeful look on his face, which promptly invites a snarl from Kyuhyun.  
  
“It's for that stupid fashion show!”  
  
“Oh, you’ll be participating in it too?” Another grin spreads across Siwon’s face. “That’s great! I wonder why Mi didn’t mention it to me.”  
  
“Heechul’s camp,” Changmin volunteers the information when Kyuhyun only fumes in silence. “And your KyuKyu will be wearing a dress,” he adds, purely for emphasis.  
  
It’s a good thing that experience has taught him well, and so Changmin quickly makes his escape before Kyuhyun can break free from his boyfriend’s arms.  
  
  
–  
  
  
He completely forgets about the fashion show until two weeks later.  
  
His workload for this semester is heavy and Changmin spends a long succession of days and nights sitting in front of his laptop, coding for his last project before midterms with only one or two hours of sleep scattered in between. Thankfully, Kyuhyun starts talking to him again after a bribe of _ddeokbokki_ and ice cream and finally deigns to lend his skill and helps.  
  
On Friday, one minute before deadline, Changmin successfully submits his project.  
  
 _Awesome,_ Heechul comments in their group chat after Changmin’s capslock-ed burst of euphoria. _Now get here. We have fitting to do._  
  
His mood takes a drastic plunge. Changmin has been looking forward to spending the next forty-eight hours making sweet, dreamy love to his bed and doing absolutely nothing else. He glares at his phone screen for about ten minutes, but in the end decides to obey the summon and slowly trudges his way to the Fashion Design building.  
  
Kyuhyun is already there in Heechul’s dorm when he arrives. His roommate is scowling heavily in the middle of the room as Heechul prowls and takes his measurement and winds girly-looking fabrics around his curvy figure. The look on his face suggests that there is nothing he wants more right now than to gather the multitudes of needles littered all around the place and stabs Heechul’s eyes with them.  
  
Changmin is very much amused—but then Heechul turns to his direction and says, “Let’s get you in a dress too.”  
  
That sobers him up pretty quickly. “We drew lots. I’m one of the men.”  
  
“I changed my mind,” Heechul says breezily and grabs one of his arms in a surprisingly strong grip. “Now I’ll just compare you all and see who looks best in a dress.”  
  
The next half an hour is a nightmare coming true.  
  
“This is ridiculous,” Changmin grumbles when Heechul clips three enormous feathers to what looks like a very large, very purple bonnet which he has been forced to wear. Kyuhyun, in an obviously vengeful spirit, is cackling like a maniac in the bed. “ _You_ are ridiculous.”  
  
“Hggfffgghhh,” Heechul mutters ominously, his mouth full of pins.  
  
“There’s no way that a guy will look good in a dress. Are you sure you’re even trying to win?”  
  
Heechul’s glare intensifies and his silence gains a menacing edge.  
  
“People are going to laugh at you,” Changmin continues, painfully aware of the danger and yet unable to care. He is tired and cranky and right now he just hates everyone and everything except his bed. “The concept is just awful. Who wants to watch guys strutting around in drags and all these ridiculous clothes– stop _fucking_ stabbing me.”  
  
“You shut your mouth right now or I’ll sew it shut,” Heechul growls at him, brandishing the rest of his needles and pins like lethal weapons. Changmin snorts, far from intimidated. In fact, he is about to launch a scathing reply when the bathroom door cracks open and someone walks out.  
  
“ _Hyung_ , I think this isn't–”  
  
Junsu stops in his track. Changmin stares at him for about two seconds, and then bursts into a long, wild, scornful laugh.  
  
“See? Who the fuck wants to look at something so ugly?”  
  
He doesn’t regret it until Junsu rushes back into the bathroom and slams the door behind him.  
  
  
–  
  
  
In Changmin’s defence, the outfit is exceedingly and intolerably hideous.  
  
First of all, it looks like a cross between a too-tight corset and a too-small mini dress consisting only of laces and frills. And then there is also the unfortunate effect it makes on Junsu, who isn’t exactly the skinniest of guys and is rather sizable in some parts of his body.  
  
This is what he tries to make Heechul see while the senior is screaming his head off at him. Predictably enough, his effort fails spectacularly.  
  
“I can’t believe what a fucking jerk you are! And I've always thought that you’re a decent guy! Who has a heart if not brains! But you just– ugh!”  
  
“I’m just saying it as it is, alright?” Changmin finally manages to get a few words in when Heechul pauses for breath. “He looks like a freak in that getup!”  
  
“The dress is _four_ sizes too small, you complete moron!” Heechul snarls, throwing every piece of fabric he can get his hand on at Changmin. “Of course it won’t look good on him! I haven't adjusted it yet! Do you think you look so fucking pretty right now?”  
  
Changmin swallows, a horrible feeling spreading inside him. Words are bubbling up his throat, but none of them makes it to his tongue, let alone past his lips. Something that feels suspiciously like guilt is hammering them down, back to the horrible pit in his stomach.  
  
“Get out,” Heechul growls, pointing at the door. “I don't want to see your face until you fucking apologise to him.”  
  
Changmin purses his lips and storms out. He doesn't even care that he is still wearing the ridiculous clothes Heechul has forced on him. At least he gets the pleasure of stripping them off of his body and flinging them to a dirty, dusty corner once he’s alone in the privacy of his room.  
  
Kyuhyun returns fifteen minutes later, opening the door more quietly than usual. Changmin only needs one look at his best friend’s face to know that he isn’t the only one upset.  
  
“What, you’re angry at me too?”  
  
Kyuhyun doesn’t answer until he sits on his bed, wearing the kind of face Changmin has never seen before. “I’ll be wearing one of those stupid dresses too,” he finally says, his voice strange, almost cold. “And I’ll look weird and fat and ugly too. Just FYI.”  
  
Changmin is torn between completely hating himself and completely hating the world that clearly completely hates him. “Damn it, Kyu, you know I didn’t mean it like that.” The guilt multiplies tenfold and he can hear his voice cracking. “I was just… my mouth just ran off on its own and I didn't really think–”  
  
“Whatever,” Kyuhyun snaps, on his feet and out of the door again in less than three seconds.  
  
  
–  
  
  
The midterms start in the following week.  
  
Changmin, for once, is incredibly grateful. Cramming for exams definitely means less and less sleep for him, but at least it will also take his mind off things. He doesn’t have to think about anything else but his exams and he doesn’t have to feel guilty about it; after all, studying is his priority, right?  
  
The worse part, though, is trying to avoid his best friend and roommate. Changmin has taken to crashing at Minho's place whenever he needs to sleep. It isn’t that Minho exactly minds—being his junior in the same major and therefore benefitting from Changmin’s superior knowledge in some courses—but the fact remains that he isn’t talking to Kyuhyun and Changmin cannot help but feel like crap about the whole thing.  
  
They’ll talk, Changmin promises himself. After the midterms are done, they’re going to talk. For the time being, though, he’ll just focus on his exams and avoid his dorm room as much as possible.  
  
Which is why Tuesday evening sees him walking into a Starbucks with his laptop in one arm and two hefty textbooks on operating system in another. He fully intends to study, but he has barely settled into a comfortable corner with a cup of double espresso when he notices Junsu holed up in the opposite corner, surrounded by books and notes.  
  
Two heartbeats later, the other boy looks up, catches his eyes, and freezes.  
  
Changmin is out of there in less than ten seconds.  
  
  
–  
  
  
He goes to another coffee shop on Wednesday.  
  
This time, there is no Junsu, and Changmin breathes out in relief.  
  
He has been sitting in a quiet corner table for close to two hours, coding and recoding and memorising all he can about database programming, when Junsu walks in with five books of varying sizes and thicknesses.  
  
There is a moment of horrible inaction as they once more stare at each other acros half-filled tables and chattering groups of students. Changmin very much wants to escape from the place, but pride holds him rooted to spot (the spot being a hard wooden chair which has been eating his ass raw for the last hour or so).  
  
This time, it’s Junsu who turns around and walks away.  
  
  
–  
  
  
The third time it happens, it’s in the library.  
  
Changmin pretty much has never stepped a foot in it during his entire college life. The fact that he is now reduced to coming to the library to study is a good illustration of how desperate he is.  
  
Still, study he must, and Changmin has just claimed one of the empty cubicles when someone passes behind him and _trips_. Changmin turns around—and yes, of course, it’s _Junsu_ , half-kneeling on the floor, surrounded by old thick yellowing books which will probably be seeing their bicentennials in the near future.  
  
Changmin rises to his feet and offers a hand without thinking. Only later, after Junsu’s eyes have focused on said hand, that a train of _whatnowwhatnowyoustupidfuckwhatnowohmygodyouresuchanidiot_ runs through his head.  
  
“I’m sorry,” he blurts out, for lack of anything else to say.  
  
Junsu’s face remains expressionless. One of his hands is still clutching a thick, formidable-looking book close to his chest— _A Study of Joseon Period Literature_ , Changmin cannot help but notice. He feels inordinately stupid holding his hand out emptily like that, but to take it back would be even worse, and so he forces himself to hold the pose and suffer the suspense of waiting. He probably deserves it anyway.  
  
“I know I was behaving like a complete jerk the other day,” he says again, now desperate, almost scared at the lack of reaction from the other student. “But I didn’t mean to laugh. Really, I didn't. It's just… it was a really weird day. I hadn't been sleeping the night before, so I was dog-tired and Heechul was an annoying bitch as usual and he kept stabbing me with needles and I just wanted to kill everyone and you… you happened to walk out.”  
  
Junsu's eyes shift, from his hand to his face, but still no response is forthcoming. Changmin gulps nervously. He feels really small and helpless under the unreadable gaze as the silence stretches on, unforgiving.  
  
“Um, so,” he swallows, starting again, “I guess my point is, I’m sorry for being mean and insensitive and stupid and unpleasant and… if you can bring yourself to forgive me, then maybe—just maybe—we can start over?” He raises his hand a little higher, this time with a hopeful smile. “Hi, I’m Shim Changmin and I can be a jerk sometimes, especially when I’m hungry or sleepy, but I swear that I’m actually a really nice guy. I’ll prove it to you if you’ll let me, but I kinda understand too if you won’t.”  
  
Changmin waits nervously as Junsu once more stares at his hand. The ball is totally in the other court now, and Changmin can only wait for his judgment.  
  
After what feels like half of eternity, Junsu finally accepts his hand and stands up.  
  
“Junsu,” he says, firmly clasping Changmin’s hand. “I hate jerks, but I also happen to believe in second chances.  
  
Changmin blinks. “Really?” he asks, suddenly breathless.  
  
“And I like vanilla latte.”  
  
“Awesome.” Changmin grins, relief flooding through his system and leaving him giddy with joy. “What do you say if we ditch this godforsaken place and look for some other place with coffee instead? My treat.”  
  
Junsu still looks uncertain at first, but then a smile blooms on his lips and he nods. “Alright.”  
  
That one word is all it takes for Changmin to feel happier that he has been in weeks.  
  
  
–  
  
  
His friendship with Kyuhyun takes longer to repair.  
  
Most of it is because they no longer see each other. Changmin’s best guess is that Kyuhyun is also avoiding him—probably spending most of his time now with his friends from the Math department or with Siwon. He doesn’t even come back to the dorm for a shower or a nap anymore. But then again, Siwon owns an apartment just off the campus ground, so Changmin cannot say that he is surprised.  
  
It isn’t like he doesn’t have any other friend. He has plenty, and is quickly gaining another one in Junsu, considering how much time they have spent together throughout the midterms—but Changmin simply misses his best friend.  
  
Said best friend doesn’t appear until the exam weeks are done. Changmin has only slept for three hours (after acing his last two exams by studying nonstop for two consecutive nights), and he wakes up with a pounding headache to the sound of someone _pounding_ at his door.  
  
He marches to the door, yanks it open, and shouts, “WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU WANT.”  
  
Kyuhyun, who has been standing at the other side, promptly bursts into tears.  
  
Changmin has barely processed the fact that his evil, snarky roommate and long-time friend is crying ( _crying_!) when Kyuhyun pushes past him and stumbles into their shared room. The unsteady walk and strong whiff of alcohol coming from his direction tells Changmin all he needs to know.  
  
“You’re drunk.”  
  
Kyuhyun whirls around, angry, bloodshot eyes shooting fire at him. “Yeah. And ugly and fat, but whatever. Fuck you too.”  
  
And then he throws up on Changmin’s bed.  
  
The next two hours will be forever engraved in Changmin’s mind as one of the most traumatising nights in his life. After making sure that his weeping mess of a friend is safely tucked in bed (the right one), he runs to a 24-hour laundry coin with the soiled sheets and has them dealt with immediately. Done with the unpleasant business, he makes a stop at a minimarket to buy some aspirin, instant coffee, and bottles of energy drink.  
  
Then he returns to his room and spends the rest of the night bundled up at the foot of Kyuhyun’s bed—because he _is_ still so tired and call him soft or something but he simply can’t bring himself to leave his best friend in search of a more comfortable place to sleep.  
  
The next morning proceeds just as expected. Kyuhyun spends almost half an hour in the bathroom and Changmin has almost fallen asleep again in the middle of the bed when he finally comes out, looking like he has just been chased out of hell. He downs a few tablets of aspirin and then falls back into his bed, kicking Changmin out in the process.  
  
“I’m not joining the fashion show,” he says before his friend can launch into a highly-justified protest.  
  
Changmin immediately forgets every single word in his argument. “What? Why?”  
  
“Because I’m ugly and fat and he can look for someone else for all I care,” Kyuhyun snaps and buries himself under the blanket.  
  
Changmin can only stare in hazy bewilderment at the heap that is his best friend, brain not fully functioning yet. It’s Kyuhyun who finally peeks from under the blanket and breaks their silence.  
  
“Did I puke on your bed?”  
  
That successfully returns the scowl to Changmin’s face. “What do you _think_?”  
  
“Oh.” Kyuhyun goes silent again for a few seconds—and then his face goes through a series of different expressions before settling somewhere between glee and guilt. “I’m sorry,” he manages to say between helpless bursts of laughter.  
  
“I’ll show you sorry.” Growling, Changmin pounces on his friend and starts tickling him like mad. Kyuhyun thrashes and squirms and giggles, but still refuses to leave the cocoon of his blanket.  
  
The match ends in a stalemate, with Changmin draped over the bundled-up Kyuhyun.  
  
“You’re not fat,” he mumbles against the soft blanket. “Whoever says that is an asshole. Just because you’re not skinny like a stick doesn’t mean that you’re fat.”  
  
“Dun’ wanna talk about it,” comes the muffled, sullen answer after a pause.  
  
“Fine,” Changmin sighs and proceeds to make himself comfortable around his best friend. He ignores Kyuhyun's whines and struggles and falls back into sleep in less than a minute.  
  
  
–  
  
  
The culprit, as he has suspected all along, is Heechul.  
  
Changmin figures out what happened when he checks his phone and finds seven messages from the senior student. The first few are delivered in the same high-and-mighty tone for which Heechul is incredibly infamous, but the last three are practically pleas for help.  
  
 _I didn’t have time to fix the dress, alright? Wasn't my fault exams were such a bitch.  
  
Look, I know I shouldn’t have said that, but I was just so fucking stressed out.  
  
WHY DIDN’T HE PICK UP MY CALLS, DAMN IT._  
  
The fact is, Kyuhyun’s phone has been silent the whole day. Changmin highly suspects that it has been put on silent mode and tells Heechul as much. What quickly follows is a long-winded message which basically lets Changmin know that he hasn't been replaced and _I know that you've apologised to our Junsu so come to the next fitting session on Wednesday._ The message ends with another plea, poorly disguised in a rather obvious question on how to deal with a moping Kyuhyun who won’t even take his calls.  
  
 _Come here personally and beg,_ Changmin gleefully types in. _And enlist Siwon's help. You’ll need it._  
  
It quickly becomes obsvious which part of his advice that Heechul deigns to follow first when Siwon appears in front of their door later that afternoon, armed with ten packages of food.  
  
“Hi,” he greets Changmin with his blinding trademark smile. “Is Kyuhyun in?”  
  
“I don’t want to see him,” comes the cold answer from inside the room. Siwon’s face falls and Changmin stifles a snort. He closes the door behind them and looks at Siwon, hands on his hips.  
  
“Heechul put you up to this?”  
  
“Sort of,” Siwon admits, glancing at the closed door. “How is he feeling?”  
  
“As well as you can expect after someone called him fat and ugly.”  
  
Siwon nods tightly. “I’ve had words with Heechul,” he replies, voice quiet. Changmin suppresses an involuntary shiver at all the unsaid implications. Siwon is a nice guy most of the times, but no one sane will dare to mess with him when he is in the serious and/or protective mode.  
  
“Good, now fix him, please.” Changmin reaches for the handle once more and pushes the door open.  
  
Kyuhyun, who is lounging in bed and in the process of decimating whatever alien race he currently holds a grudge at, shoots him a deadly glare. “You fucker.”  
  
“He brings food,” Changmin says with a shrug. “Who am I to say no to that?”  
  
Kyuhyun looks like he’s about to throw something at him, but then his eyes catch the sight of all the boxes and bags in Siwon’s hands and his expression darkens.  
  
“Are you trying to make me fat?”  
  
That earns him a frown from his boyfriend. Siwon deposits the food on Changmin’s desk—which gives Changmin a perfectly legitimate excuse to claim a box of _gamjajeon_ —and then goes to sit on the edge of Kyuhyun’s bed.  
  
“Heechul said he was sorry.”  
  
Changmin winces. Really, Siwon could’ve come up with a more believable lie. Kyuhyun obviously agrees when he only scoffs at his boyfriend’s words.  
  
“It's true.”  
  
“Whatever. He's still right and I’m still fat.”  
  
“You’re not fat.”  
  
“Your opinion doesn’t count.”  
  
“It doesn’t?” Siwon suddenly looks sad.  
  
“Because you’re biased, okay?” Kyuhyun snaps, obviously feeling guilty but nowhere near close to admitting it. “Other people look at me and think that I'm fat.”  
  
“But you’re _not_ ,” Siwon says sternly, seizing Kyuhyun’s hands. “Listen to me, do you think that I love you because you look perfect? Because you look the way you do now? Seriously, to hell with that. I plan to grow old with you, Kyuhyun. I plan to be with you for the rest of my life. And…”  
  
He pauses, biting his lower lip to hold back a smile. “You'll hate me for this, but just let me say it once. For all we know, you will probably get fat when we get older because you just love food too much— _no, don’t be upset, please just let me finish_. Because you see—I _don'_ t care. I don’t care if you become fat or whatever you think you are, because you know what? We’ll all grow old and ugly later in life, but I’m in love with you, Cho Kyuhyun, and I love you for being you and I don’t plan to stop loving you only because of something like that, so please–”  
  
To Changmin’s relief, Kyuhyun chooses that moment to break out of his stupor and shut his boyfriend up with a kiss. He isn't sure how much more of the man's cheesiness he can take before throwing up all those delicious pieces he just ate.  
  
“Min,” Kyuhyun manages to say amidst his frantic kisses and breathy moans, “please go away.”  
  
Changmin rolls his eyes. “Three hours,” he states, grabbing another carton of food before heading to the door. “And stay away from my side of the room!”  
  
  
–  
  
  
His life proceeds more or less normally afterwards.  
  
Or at least, as normally as one might expect from a busy college student involved in the preparation of an all-male fashion show. But Changmin isn't complaining. None of his friends is mad at him anymore, and that, in Changmin's opinion, is the principal key to a happy college life.  
  
“You’re with Junsu.”  
  
Changmin gapes at Heechul, who is embroidering some pink lacy stuff on the floor. “I'm _what_?”  
  
“One of my themes is Phantom of the Opera and you two are suited for it best IMO.” The older student suddenly pauses and looks up from his threads and needles, eyes narrowed at Changmin. “Any problem with that? You’re okay with him now, aren’t you?”  
  
Changmin snaps his mouth shut. Which is a good thing because a moment later, Junsu comes out from Heechul’s bathroom.  
  
“How is it?” Heechul turns to the other boy while Changmin is obliged to spend a few seconds wondering if Junsu is in fact _living_ in Heechul’s bathroom.  
  
“It fits,” Junsu answers in that soft, meek voice of his, face suspiciously pink.  
  
“See? I told you it’d fit,” Heechul declares triumphantly. “You’ll look fabulous on D-day, believe me.”  
  
Junsu only makes a face at him before turning toward Changmin, smiling sweetly. “So you’re my partner.”  
  
Changmin’s mouth suddenly goes dry but he manages to bleat out a faint ‘yes’. Junsu’s smile widens.  
  
“Great. I’ll feel more comfortable if it’s you.”  
  
Changmin is still trying to analyse the fact that his stomach seems to react in a very unnatural manner to what is supposed to be a very natural and innocuous sentence when the other speaks again, “By the way, do you want to get some pizza? I’m seriously craving for pepperoni and cheese.”  
  
“Sure,” he hears himself answer, his pitch a bit too high. Heechul raises an eyebrow at him, but to Changmin’s relief, he declines the invitation to join them.  
  
“Have fun,” he only says—though not without a smirk that insinuates so much more.  
  
Changmin only realises what it means ten minutes later.  
  
  
–  
  
  
Recent examples notwithstanding, he is no stranger to the concept of attraction.  
  
Changmin started dating in junior high, and since then has been steadily moving from one girl to the next with only brief periods of intermission in between. In fact, he can safely say that he is quite the ladies’ man (and this is where Kyuhyun usually starts laughing hysterically).  
  
The point is, he understands attraction. He just doesn’t understand why he is feeling it toward another male right now.  
  
A sweet, shy, kind, cute, really attractive male—but still.  
  
“I’m not gay.”  
  
Neither Heechul nor Kyuhyun responds. They are too absorbed in beating the crap out of each other (virtually) to spare Changmin even the barest modicum of interest at this point.  
  
“Unlike a certain roommate of mine,” he continues darkly, “I don’t ogle at every good-looking, muscled-up hunk that happens to walk in front of me.”  
  
That successfully gets said roommate’s attention. “I _don’t_ ogle,” Kyuhyun hisses, shooting a glare at Changmin’s direction—and getting his character swiftly pummelled as the result.  
  
“My point is,” Changmin continues after fending off Kyuhyun’s vengeful attack with a pillow, “I’m not gay.”  
  
“But you have a crush on Junsu,” Heechul joins in with a mad grin, clearly still basking in the glory of winning a gruelling battle.  
  
“I'm straight.”  
  
A scoff. “Irrelevant.”  
  
“Can you imagine what my girlfriend–”  
  
“Ex-girlfriend.”  
  
“Yeah, whatever, but the fact stands that only two months ago, I still had a girlfriend.”  
  
“Who dumped you because you're too gay,” Kyuhyun adds, snickering behind his can of beer.  
  
“Thank you, Cho, you'll get the prettiest dress in my collection for your help,” Heechul says magnanimously.  
  
Changmin cackles at the look on his best friend’s face, but quickly sobers up when Heechul fixes a pair of shrewd eyes at him.  
  
“Be as in denial as you want,” the senior student declares. “Just don’t be a jackass. Don’t dangle him if you’re not interested. You might be as straight as you claim, but we don’t know about him.”  
  
Changmin can feel something heavy drop into his stomach. “What are you saying?”  
  
“Just that.” Heechul shrugs and starts a new game.  
  
  
–  
  
  
Changmin doesn’t have anything against homosexuality.  
  
Hell, his best friend is gay and they've been sleeping in the same room for three years now. Besides, he isn’t quite as inexperienced in that part of life as Heechul seems to believe either. There were experiments, once and twice, with a high school buddy who showed a rather blatant though harmless interest in him during second grade.  
  
All in all, there is no reason why his newest crush should unsettle him this much—but it _does_.  
  
Changmin finds out why a week before the show, and all it takes is a smile.  
  
Junsu is sitting in one of the stone benches near the library building, reading a book, and when he looks up at Changmin's greeting, _smiles._  
  
It's an ordinary smile, but it also happens to be the most beautiful smile Changmin has ever seen.  
  
Junsu is saying something but Changmin isn’t really listening because the smile is still there, eclipsing everything else, and he finds himself returning it as easily as breathing.  
  
The conclusion is, Changmin reflects numbly, is that 'the crush' is definitely more serious than he thinks.  
  
  
–  
  
  
The paper taped to the door leading to the next room says NO PEEKING in big bold red letters.  
  
“He wants it to be a surprise,” Victoria, who is busy applying make up to his face, informs him matter-of-factly. “The ‘gentlemen’ must not see the ‘ladies’ and the ‘ladies’ must not see the ‘gentlemen’ until everyone is ready.”  
  
Changmin is familiar enough with Heechul’s flairs of dramatics to do more than sighs. Resigning himself to a long, suspenseful wait, he settles into his chair and lets Victoria do her job.  
  
The show will begin in an hour, and he feels like he is making the biggest mistake in his life.  
  
It isn’t as if he has any problem with appearing in public or parading himself under so many pairs of eyes—as walking down the catwalk will definitely make him into—but something about this show is giving him cold feet. It's the reason why he sits there, fiddling with his shiny tie in anxious silence, as the preparations rush about him in whirlwinds of noises and colours.  
  
So far, everything looks fine at the gentlemen’s end. Yunho and Kangin successfully bring the definition of handsomeness to a whole new level, one in a furry coat while the other an elegant, embroidered tuxedo. Jongwoon, going for something different and purer, looks striking in white, the Chinese-style jacket a complement to his delicate features.  
  
He doesn’t look too bad himself, Changmin thinks as Sunny drags him to stand in front of the mirror after he is done with his make up. While she is busy adorning his person with accessories, Changmin studies his reflection. His legs are definitely his most valuable assets, but he has to admit that the Phantom-esque outfit does make him look different, and in a very good way. Showing these clothes off on the catwalk will be no problem at all.  
  
The problem is he won’t be doing it alone.  
  
As if hearing his thought, the door swings open and reveals an untidy but smug-looking Heechul. “Gentlemen,” he announces with a flourish of hand, for once paying no mind to his unkempt appearance, “now I present to you, your beautiful ladies.”  
  
Sungmin walks out first, wearing a gold-green dress covered with Eastern motifs. He looks absolutely lovely—he really does—but Changmin’s eyes are fixed on the second figure, walking quietly and gracefully like a fairy princess out of a fairy tale. Junsu is not beautiful; he is _breathtaking_. The white dress falls over his tightly corseted figure like a drape of snow. A loose, silvery belt gracefully falls around the curves of his waist and a long fluffy white shawl covers the broadness of his shoulders. He makes such a wonderful contrast to Changmin's black and red that Changmin finds himself taking back every word he has ever said (or thought) about Junsu's not fitting the role--because, as it turns out, Heechul _does_ know what he is doing.  
  
Although it doesn't exactly explain his breathlessness when Junsu comes up to him and smiles. “How do I look?”  
  
Changmin swallows and finally manages to croak, “I don’t know how to even _begin_ to answer that question.”  
  
Junsu only laughs, a light blush dusting his cheeks. Or perhaps it's the make up. Changmin can see the wonders a bit of mascara, eyeshadow, and lipstick do in lending a feminine illusion to a male's face. The long wig is a great help too, falling across one shoulder in thick rivulets of black and showing off the beautiful shape of his neck.  
  
Heechul _definitely_ knows what he is doing.  
  
It's Changmin who doesn't know what to do with himself as soon as the initial shock has passed. He finds himself tongue-tied and can only glance repeatedly (and furtively) at Junsu's direction as they fall into an awkward silence.  
  
Changmin cannot help but envy the other pairs. Yunho and Kyuhyun are good friends and Yunho’s calmness is a match for Kyuhyun’s sharp tongue anytime anywhere. Kangin and Sungmin, both already in long-term relationships with their respective girlfriends, laugh and flirt easily with each other. Jongwoon and Ryeowook are a different case, but from where Changmin stands, they look like a shy but happy couple in the first blush of attraction.  
  
Thankfully, the show begins fifteen minutes later. Zhou Mi's team gets the first turn.  
  
If Heechul is full of creative, daring, even _revolutionary_ ideas, then Zhou Mi brings the simple and classics to the highest degree of achievement. He works with curves and lines rather than vibrant colours and ornaments, but the effect is no less powerful, at least in Changmin's opinion. He watches with interest—and no small amount of amusement—as Siwon completely _owns_ the catwalk with the gorgeous Im Yoona; the pair does know how to be most impressive, most dazzling centre of attention.  
  
Changmin cannot help but snicker when he notices the way his best friend glowers at them. In his black, fur-lined gown, Kyuhyun looks every inch the jealous wife who sees her husband flirting with another woman. It isn’t that he doesn’t understand jealousy, but the cause itself is so ridiculous that he wonders if the old saying has some credence after all. Maybe love does make idiots of us all.  
  
Because later, when Kyuhyun takes Yunho’s hand and lets the other man spin him around in a waltz, there is no mistaking the look on Siwon’s face. Changmin sighs and shakes his head at the idiot couple—and then he remembers that _he_ will be up next.  
  
A worried look is all he can share with Junsu before he is ushered on stage. The gentleman goes up first. Changmin takes a deep breath and walks into the catwalk, following the loud, fast beat of the music to control his steps. A roar of cheers and catcalls greet him, coming mostly from his friends and classmates, and Changmin finds himself smiling. The earlier nervousness bleeds out of him quickly.  
  
And then Junsu appears, pretty and radiant in white. He is wearing a timid smile that Changmin has come to adore so much. His heart races again, leaving him both giddy and helpless—and perhaps Junsu notices something in his face, because for a moment, uncertainty trickles into his expression and his pace falters slightly.  
  
But then Changmin offers his hand. Junsu pauses, then reaches out to accept it, brightly smiling, and it feels like the most natural thing in the world.  
  
  
–  
  
  
Changmin cannot say that he is really surprised when Heechul is declared the winner later that evening.  
  
Zhou Mi attributes his loss to what he stubbornly calls a cheap tactic— _really, men as women? REALLY?_ —but he isn't a sore loser. He is too good a designer to doubt that his achievements are anything less than first class.  
  
“It will be different next time,” he promises his rival, who only grins smugly in return.  
  
Heechul is in the seventh heaven. He has expressed his gratitude to his team in a short, almost abrupt speech and promised to buy them all a few rounds of drink. And then he takes his models aside one by one and whispers a few words to each, getting either a laugh, a grin, or a hug (this one from Ryeowook, who is still wearing a large purple feather in his hair).  
  
Not Kyuhyun though. His face registers shock, then rage, and Changmin quickly escapes the vicinity because Kyuhyun is marching toward Siwon and he is clearly about to start World War III. He catches Heechul’s eyes in the process, but the senior only smirks and nods toward the backstage.  
  
And Changmin realises, his mouth suddenly dry, that Heechul is giving each one of them a gift.  
  
He can pretty much guess what his is going to be.  
  
Changmin makes his way backstage with Kyuhyun’s loud, shrill voice in the background— _HOW DARE YOU LET ME SUFFER THROUGH THIS HUMILIATION WHEN **YOU ACTUALLY COULD STOP IT**_ —and wanders from room to room. He finds Junsu in a deserted one, struggling to get out of his dress.  
  
Junsu notices his presence almost immediately and smiles. “Hi, can you help me with this?”  
  
There is a glimpse of white shoulder and Changmin swallows—although his feet also sort of make their own decision and step into the room. His fingers, cold as ice, are surprisingly steady when he helps with the zipper, and then corset.  
  
“I’m glad it’s a success,” Junsu says again, distracting Changmin from a steadily increasing urge to touch that soft-looking skin.  
  
“Of course it’s a success,” Changmin hears himself blurt out. “You looked perfect.”  
  
Junsu glances at him, his smile turning shy, and Changmin catches himself thinking _if only you’re a girl_ —but doesn’t allow himself to finish that thought. It doesn’t feel right, somehow.  
  
“Maybe you’d like me better that way,” Junsu says again, his voice fainter.  
  
Their eyes meet in the mirror, and Changmin suddenly finds the courage which has eluded him since the realisation first came.  
  
“No,” he says, holding his gaze. “I’m sure I wouldn’t.”  
  
“Really?” Junsu is looking at him, expression inscrutable. “Even if I say that I want to spend the night with you?”  
  
Changmin’s heart stops. His mouth falls open in shock and the rest of the world suddenly makes less sense than it did a moment ago. The offer—or challenge, it certainly feels like one—totally blindsides him that he can barely process it for the first few seconds. And even after he has, there is nothing he can say because his brain has gone numb and his tongue is definitely turning into lead.  
  
Junsu remains silent but he has dropped his gaze. Changmin watches his reflection, hands fisted at his side, and comes to a decision that Shim Changmin is an idiot but he is definitely not a coward.  
  
“My room is comfy enough,” he finally breaks the silence, voice still trembling and all. “I mean, if you don’t mind. The bed is quite large too, although Kyu threw up on it a few weeks ago.”  
  
Junsu raises his eyebrows, and then bursts into laugh. When he looks up at Changmin, his eyes are smiling.  
  
“I don’t mind.”  
  
  
–  
  
  
 _Dude. Where are you.  
  
Siwon’s._  
  
Of course. Changmin snorts and types in a quick reply.  
  
 _Good. Don’t come back until tomorrow. Afternoon._  
  
It only takes three seconds for the answer to arrive. _Fucking finally._  
  
Changmin grins and pulls a naked, giggling Junsu closer into his arms.  
  
  
\---  
  
  
  
---


End file.
